Goodbye, Farewell, Godspeed

When you have had a several decade long relationship with anything (or anybody) it is right and proper to review the time, energy, and ultimately reason the relationship has moved on. This is about my ties to the church called Unitarian Universalist.

I came to this church around 1980. When an important job position demanded I attend church regularly. There was no demand what church, so I picked one I knew (a tiny bit) about: Unitarian (Henceforth known as UU). The first Sunday I visited, There was a pew dance - that was fun, and a good omen as far as I was concerned. The more I learned about the denomination, the more drawn to it I became. "Liked the people, history, moral messages, etc. I became a better person for being a member.
As time wore on, I received training in leadership that helped me help the church. It also made me a better person. Is the tension building? Ready for the BUT... (?)

I, along with my family had been members of 3 congregations. First UU, Emerson, and NW Community over the course of 35 years. I left First UU because I felt the the politically correct atmosphere was driving a lack of discussion by people that may not be "just like us". Freedom of speech is reduced when a person gets clobbered for speaking their mind and their mind is not in lock-step with the 'community'.

I then moved my family to Emerson UU. It was more upscale, had more diversity in the membership, and had a religious education program of great renown. Kids got schooled on religious matters and more importantly sex. It was a pretty good family church, I made friends and grew as a person. I persuaded the board to send me to Leadership School.

I left that congregation for an opportunity of starting a new church in NW Houston. - A chance to use my leadership training! I stayed with this congregation about 20 years. Our big plans to grow a fabulous church in NW Houston never came to pass. I made friends there, worked on important matters; worship, music, how to pay the rent, etc.The church never made it past 75 members. In fact it stayed about 55-60 members. I left there to return to my first church, First (UU) Church to avoid seeing my ex every Sunday.
 'Spent a year singing in the choir at the downtown church, and then took a break. Another church I had visited on and off for years, Unity Houston became my new home. Moving services, beautiful campus, ministers with a strong message. Much happier now than I have been on many a Sunday.
When I resigned from First Church, a few people prodded me to name who I was angry with, or share the source of my disappointment. I am not mad at anyone... I am disappointed with myself for staying so long after I should have left. The only image I can describe regarding the UU church is this:

We have a meal of potatoes to feed on.

Unity, where I am now, is where their is a good size fire under that pot. The water is boiling, and people are eating potatoes.
When I look back on my former faith, I see that pot, I see the potatoes, and I see a small dinner candle NOT boiling water, not cooking potatoes, not feeding people.

Inspiration is what creates heat/fire moves people of the spirit to do great things (or at least more than they thought they could do). The humanist perspective squelching the theistic contribution, makes for blandness that turns the church into a cross between and civic club and a plain ole social club.What do I mean by that? You have a set of touchy people that get upset when they hear the word God, or a reference to Jesus, etc.
Again, I do not harbor ill towards my former church or friends that attend. For me, it was time to move on.

My Life In Parts

I have been reading Bryan Cranston's book A Life In Parts.
Clever title for a memoir by an actor.
Little essays where he identifies his 'role' as son, farmhand, Walter White, etc. and tells a tale about being in that role.
     I have attempted the same here in this blog in a more indirect way. 'Gonna try it for a while to see how it feels. Instead of going 50-60 years back, I like to start where we (I) are/am/is now. You try it too...
If you gave a name to your "Role" at the present time what would it be? Be honest... I'll just wait a few minutes to let you collect your thoughts (but don't over-think it) ...............................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................

Okay, I'm back (each of those dots was a minute or second if you prefer).

I'll share first.
I will identify as "Boyfriend" at the present.
Sounds a bit strange even to me. (After all, I am 64 years old!!)
I have been in this role about 20 months and find it quite agreeable. K and I have our thing that takes place every weekend cue John Mayer and it is pretty great. We are in total agreement on that.
I still have the smaller and just as important roles going like father, piano technician, church-goer, companion to a pair of dogs, grass farmer, and so on...  but I promised a tale related to the role...

This one goes back to our early days dating. When we first met, we were both in the final stages of divorce from long marriages, pretty new to living single, feeling out of touch with the dating scene, but interested in companionship of the opposite sex.
First date had us at a minor league baseball game, the first either of us had attended. We were with a group from a social club I belonged to, there were about 30 of us sitting together. I took some ribbing from someone because I was sitting in the middle of 4 lovely ladies (besides my date). The comment was something like "There's Cubil, surrounded by his harem". Sparking a nervous ha-ha from me, a strange look from my date.

 Fast forward to the middle of the game. We were having a bite of ballpark food, in this case a stuffed potato and had full mouths of the delicious BBQ, when the kiss-cam decided to focus on us. My friends started with the chant: kiss! kiss! kiss! kiss! K was oblivious to what was going on, but very focused on her potato. I got her to look up and see we were on the big screen and explained it won't stop until we kiss. She smiled and we took our first kiss with mouths full of barbecue in front of a crowd of hundreds that night, and broke the ice.
I do remember the Skeeters lost to a team from a town I had never heard of. sad. But it was the start of a beautiful relationship that prompts me to identify as Boyfriend. 
Oh, feel free to share your current (or favorite from the past) role in the comments section.