Revenge Served...

Boys and girls, just to show I am not the Good Guy in all my stories, I have a tale today where Uncle Cubil is definitely not the Good Guy.


In the Chicago school system, you stay in elementary school through 8th grade, then transfer into high school for 4 years. Did I mention I did 5 years of high school in 4 years? Oh yeah, well let's move on.

I had gone from being teachers pet, to teachers pet python, not student enemy #1, just a guy who wanted to do what he wanted to do. Mainly victimless rule breaking. These crimes included going to school in an unapproved route, and jay walking.


There was a boy who lived across the street from me that was a patrol boy (like a crossing guard), and he took his role seriously. Gary Cooper seriously. He never failed to report me and my friends when he saw us break a rule. This made for many a weekend of "writing sentences"... much like Bart Simpson but on paper:

I will obey school rules (X 1000)

Side note: Thomas Jefferson must've had to do this because he invented a device for duplicating what he wrote on a second piece of paper. Or was it Ben Franklin?

I had a heart to heart with this boy several times that he needed to be less observant, but he only displayed more conviction. This, in turn caused more agitation with my friends and myself.

As the school year came to a close, we began to plot our revenge.

He always walked home the same way, at the same time, so we plotted a way to water balloon him on the last day of school. The plan was flawless, he was going down (or at least getting wet).

What we didn't count on was his reaction: he was completely spooked. 'Must've thought we were going to beat him up or at least kill him because I had never seen any boy run that fast. He passed the cars on Central avenue!

We got one balloon off before he got away and made for a zone of safety (Max's corner store).

My friends and I laughed so hard our sides hurt. We considered it over, and it was.

By happenstance, I saw the boy one more time after that; I was waiting for a friend to get out at summer school, and I heard him leaving in conversation with another student. Get this: they were talking about popular students, and he was arguing for me! That I was more popular than the guy his friend was touting! I'm still amazed at that.


As he came out, I thanked him for his support. He looked shocked (to see me), but I just grinned, then he grinned and a contest of Wills was officially over.